13 Statements and Questions to Drive Your Pastor into Early Retirement
1. A lot of people are really upset with you because of your position on_____but I won’t tell you how many or who.
2. I know what the bible says I should do about this dilemma but I’ve been praying about it and I feel like the Spirit is telling me…
3. I have a child-like faith so I don’t like to think too much about serious stuff like theology
4. Our former pastor always did it this way…
5. Strictly in confidence and just for prayer I’ve heard [enter name] is struggling with [enter scandalous sin issue]
6. I feel closer to God in the forest than I do in church.
7. Don’t worry pastor, we’ll be here every Sunday that Junior doesn’t have soccer practice or a game.
8. I don’t have just one church. I belong to every church and every Sunday morning I go wherever the Spirit leads me
9. Why are we spending so much money on missionaries in other countries when we could be spending that money here?
10. Can’t you tell that new family from the Baptist church to bow when the cross passes by ?
11. In so many words: “I give a huge pledge to this church. It sure would be a shame if you gave me a reason to reduce it.”
12. Where did all these new people come from? I want my old church back.
13. We want you concentrating on getting old lapsed members back not running around after people who’ve never even been to church.
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